


Stop thinking

by KseniyaChe



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Inspired by Art, Kidgetober2020, Post-Canon, Romance, kidgetober
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:40:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26744521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KseniyaChe/pseuds/KseniyaChe
Summary: After the victory over the Galra Empire, the Voltron team scattered in different directions. Shiro rushed to restore the Universe; Lance, heartbroken, returned to Cuba; Hunk moved to New York, where he opened his own restaurant of space cuisine. And only Keith and Pidge stayed close to the Garrison.Postcanon Keith and Pidge who found themselves alone.Written for Kidgetober2020Amazing art from fate221 that inspired me:Stop thinking
Relationships: Keith/Pidge | Katie Holt
Comments: 4
Kudos: 52





	Stop thinking

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [«Не думай»](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28127283) by [KseniyaChe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KseniyaChe/pseuds/KseniyaChe)



Pidge wandered aimlessly around the Garrison. She lived here more out of habit than necessity: moving into her parents' house didn't feel right, and the thought of a rented apartment with only a new Rover waiting for her made her feel too sad. So she took one of the rooms that the Garrison had kindly given her as one of the science lab employees.

Oddly, Pidge had always thought she was happy to be alone. She had enough family: mom, dad, brother, and dog — and no friends. Exactly until the moment when, by pure chance (or maybe not), she was carried into space on the Blue Lion of Voltron. Since then, it has grown into a handful of combat friends and comrades. And when they all returned to Earth, they added a few more guys, although with them Pidge was not as close as with Shiro or Lance, or Hunk. Or even Keith. A faint flush rose to her cheeks at the thought of him. Katie shook her head, banishing visions of a casual kiss at Shiro and Curtis's wedding.

After the victory over the Galra Empire, they all scattered in different directions. Shiro rushed to restore the Universe; Lance, heartbroken, returned home to Cuba; Hunk stayed in the Garrison for a while, more out of inertia, but then moved to New York, where he opened his own restaurant of space cuisine. Keith worked with former Lothor generals and his mother to provide humanitarian aid to war-torn planets. But after three years, he either got tired of it, or realized that it did not suit him, and he returned to Plath, where he rented a small room on the outskirts. According to Keith, the Garrison was too noisy for him. And Cosmo was more comfortable outside of the strictest discipline. Sometimes Kogane visited a small house half an hour away from the Garrison, where his father once lived, where he was born, and where the big space adventure of all five paladins began.

And then it became known about the engagement of Shiro and Curtis. On the fifth Anniversary of the victory, the two men tied the knot, and now when they weren't crossing the universe together, they were living a few hours away from the Garrison.

The "Wedding of the century" as Lance had called it when he came to stay for a couple of weeks, was booming all over the place. Pidge doesn't remember very well how she ended up with Keith, and even worse, she doesn’t remember how much she drank that night. Eventually they found themselves dancing among hundreds of guests, to Katie's horror when her alcohol-fueled mind slipped her the memory. However, this very mind refused to tell her the secret of who actually kissed whom. She only remembers the hot lips on her own and the softness of grown Kogane's hair and her fingers tangled in it. Then they seemed to drink and laugh even more, and in the morning Pidge woke up with a terrible headache and fragmentary memories of a ridiculous kiss.

Keith found her at the Garrison the next day and, trying hard to keep his face straight, apologized for the inappropriate behavior. Pidge waved it off, saying that it was nothing and that it could happen to anyone: the wedding, everyone was having fun, so they got a little carried away. But that doesn't mean anything, does it? Really? No, it doesn't.

Then why did Pidge keep coming back to that kiss over and over again? Where from the sudden warmth that was flowing through her body when she imagined Keith's arms around her?

“Stupid Keith”, Pidge swore to herself, pressing cool fingers to her flushed cheeks. She went to her room, but no matter what she did, nothing pleased her, and everything fell out of her hands. This infuriated Pidge even more than the memories that were pointless to indulge in. She and Keith have nothing in common anyway.

She had been turning the screwdriver in her hands for half of varga, or half an hour — Pidge still couldn't get back to Earth time — and her mind wandered back to the days when she was the paladin of the Green Lion and Keith — the Red one. And to the weeks when he wasn't with them and changed out of his red suit for the black and purple uniform of the Blades. Pidge sighed at the thought of Keith's slender body in a very tight suit, then blushed again, cursing herself for thinking such inappropriate thoughts. Then she remembered how he had been their commander, his firmness and strength after he had returned from the Blades. The goose turned into a swan. He became what he was supposed to be — their leader.

In the days of Voltron, Pidge missed being alone. She didn't have enough personal space, even though she had a whole lot of space at her disposal. No matter where they were or what they were doing, she knew that Lance and Hunk were somewhere behind her, Shiro watching over her from his height, experience, and knowledge. Somewhere, there was Keith, who had never pushed her, but had never given her any favors. Allura, Coran, The Blades, her found brother — it was not easy to be alone in space. And now everything is different. Their entire team broke up into small pieces, into independent units. Although they had each dreamed of returning to their earthly lives once they were in the Castle of Lions, now that they had done so, it was strange that they were apart and didn't see each other every day. Pidge used to think she missed being alone and having a family. And now she missed noisy Lance, thoughtful Hunk, wise Shiro, gentle Allura, and... Keith.

It was stupid to miss him, though. He lived closest to the Garrison. She could visit him every day if she wanted to. But this is even more stupid — they were never best friends.

Still, every now and then, Pidge found herself wondering if she should stop by his house on some evening. Just as a friend. There's no one else left. All Paladins were a big and friendly family for a  Deca-Phoeb —  one year — and now what? Scattered around the world. But still, Pidge tried not to feel these strange desires for the former leader.

Keith visited the Garrison several times after Shiro's wedding. He was on vacation, as he called it, though Katie personally thought he was just messing around. Iverson encouraged the young man to join the cadets as a teacher, but Kogane was stubborn. During several of his visits, Pidge searched his face for signs of the same sense of loneliness and loss that she felt. Or at least a hint that he would have liked the idea of spending an evening together, reminiscing about the old days over a cup of tea or, what the hell, something stronger. But Keith, like no one else, could keep a neutral expression on his face, almost without giving himself away. He just looked too closely, as if he was looking for some signs on her face, too.

That day, Pidge looked up, feeling rather than hearing Keith's soft footsteps approach her desk.

“I didn't want to bother you. I came to say goodbye.”

"Leaving already?" Katie pushed her short, unruly hair back from her forehead. She didn't let her long hair grow back. She liked it that way.

“Yes. I don't have much to do here. I don't know why I'm even here," Keith said, absently sorting through the nuts and bolts on her desk.

"To listen to Iverson lure you into his lair," Pidge said, looking alarmed at his actions: she didn't like things being moved from her desk.

Keith chuckled and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. There was a pause.

"Well, I'll see you again," Kogane was the first to break the silence. As he turned to leave, Pidge, surprised at herself, called out to him:

“Keith! Wait.”

He stood in a half-turn, his eyes asking her what was the matter.

“Maybe... we'll... uh, go out sometime?" she began timidly. And then, suddenly, she started talking fast, because he didn't say anything, and she was starting to feel like a complete idiot. What if he thinks she's asking him for a date? "Well, as friends. We are friends, right? Friends sometimes meet. We can go to the cinema. Or to a bar? I don't know where you like it best. But we don't have to go anywhere if you don't want to, but we can…”

"All right," Keith interrupted, with a slight smile at the corners of his mouth. "Call me when you want to get out to the town," he left with a wave of his hand.

Pidge froze in place. It occurred to her that a date or a friendly meeting didn't matter; he'd agreed. Katie put her head in her hands, rubbing her face. Gradually the color drained from her cheeks, and then Pidge was able to go back to work. Even so, her fingertips twitched from time to time as she remembered how awkwardly she had asked him to meet her.

Several days passed and she couldn't make up her mind to call Keith. Several times Katie picked up the phone, looked at it, even opened the contact list, found the name of her friend, but then she was scared, as if Keith could find out about her torment through the mobile screen, and put the unfortunate gadget in her pocket.

About a week after Keith's last visit to the Garrison, when Pidge finished her lab work and stretched in her chair, turning off the lamp, a message flashed on her phone screen: "Holt, you wanted to have dinner there together. I'll meet you at 7 at the Galactica.” Katie blinked several times, then read the message again and looked at her watch. Well, Keith was clearly sure that she would wear a lab coat to their friendly date.

Pidge hurried back to her room. She didn't have time for special packing, so she just changed one shirt for another, clean and fresh. She tied her short hair neatly with a kerchief, leaving the short ends sticking out on top of her head. Katie looked at herself thoughtfully in the mirror and decided that some mascara wouldn't hurt, and Keith wouldn't even notice, but it would make her look better.

When the taxi pulled up outside the brand-new Galactica cafe, Keith was already there, leaning against a shiny black sports bike, his arms crossed over his chest. Pidge swallowed hard and wiped her suddenly sweaty palms on the padded seat of the taxi car, then handed the banknote to the driver and got out of the car.

“Hi!” she smiled as casually as possible, as if it was normal for her to meet Keith in the evening and have dinner at a restaurant.

"You're late, Holt," Keith said instead of greeting.

Pidge chuckled, a typical grumpy Keith. It would be a fun dinner, and then she would go home to the Garrison. Nothing special. There's nothing to worry about.

At first, they had to overcome a few minutes of embarrassment. Pidge felt awkward around the silent Kogane. She tried to get him to talk and stir him up, but the conversation didn't go well, and Keith's answers were terse, and each time there was a pause until Katie came up with a new question. But after a couple of glasses of wine, things got better. And by the end of the evening, Pidge hadn't noticed that she was laughing almost to tears at some of Keith's stories from his time with the Blades, and catching the occasional intrigued look in his dark purple eyes.

"I had a wonderful time," Pidge said sincerely when they were outside.

"Me too, Holt. Although, I must admit, at first I thought it was a bad idea.”

Well, Pidge understood him perfectly. The white wine misted her head a little, and she found herself thinking that she didn't want to say good-bye to him now. It seemed like a bad idea to go back to the empty, cold room of the Garrison, where only the robot was waiting for her, instead of spending at least another couple of hours with a living person with whom they shared so many memories. And Katie hesitated, standing next to Keith and his bike, not ready to say good-bye, and hoping that he would ask her to go somewhere else.

"Do you want to go for a ride?" Keith asked, nodding at the bike.

Resisting the urge to jump with joy that her prayers had been answered, Pidge shrugged:

“Why not?"

She sat down behind Keith and put her hands timidly on his waist.

"Hold on tight, Holt," he said over his shoulder, starting the bike.

Pidge had gotten a glimpse of Keith's driving skills six years ago when she, Hunk and Lance had kidnapped Shiro, so her fingers tightened on the young man's leather jacket as she leaned back a little during the start. The former paladin took them out of town, following the traffic rules, at least relatively, and then gave himself free rein. He pressed the gas, and Pidge, barely suppressing a cry, hid her face behind his back, feeling the cold wind on her hands. She clung to Keith's back more and more, afraid to even look around. She remembered their first ride together on a hoverbike, and a smile touched her lips.

Pidge had lost track of time, and she had no idea where Keith was taking her. She wasn't sure if he had any purpose at all other than circling the area all night. Katie only knew that they were somewhere in the middle of the desert. But when he suddenly slowed down, turned off the main road into a country lane, and then stopped at a small wooden house, she wasn't surprised.

Swaying slightly from the adrenaline pumping through her blood, Katie slid off the bike and looked at the lone building. And how did Keith manage to live here all alone for a year? Okay, people were very annoying at times, she admitted it, but on the whole, she was used to them/ So self-imposed confinement in the desert did not seem an attractive prospect to her.

“Do you remember?” asked Keith.

"How could I forget?" said Pidge, looking at him. “Do you come here often?"

"From time to time. When I want to be alone.”

"Oh, am I disturbing you?" Pidge joked awkwardly. “Maybe I should catch a car and go to the town now?”

"Don't talk nonsense. Come on, I'll treat you something, if you don't mind.”

Pidge raised her eyebrows in surprise: was he preparing, or did he actually have supplies here?

"Don't look at me like that, Holt. I spend some time here, so there is everything you need for life.”

Pidge's old sense of unease returned. What is she doing here? Why is she drinking again? Why does Keith look at her in a strange way: not blankly and calmly, but with interest and questioning, as if checking his feelings with some inner compass.

"Do you remember...?" was the beginning of almost every sentence that Keith or Pidge uttered. They went back to their memories of being surprised by the huge Castle of Lion, how incredibly quickly they were sucked into the intergalactic war, and how disgusting they found the edible goo.

"You should call it inedible," Keith snorted.

“You never complained about it at all!" Pidge realized as she took a tiny sip of wine, afraid she might lose control again.

"Well, I had to endure all the inconveniences. I couldn't be whining like Lance, " Keith said.

"Come to think of it, you didn't complain about anything at all. Except Lance," Pidge noticed.

Keith rolled his eyes with a laugh.

In the silence that followed, the sound of crickets could be heard. Rare cars were passing somewhere far away. The night had scattered the stars across the vast sky, and a crescent moon was visible through the window. Pidge sat half-sideways, her right leg tucked under her, her left leg swinging carelessly in the air. She rested her head on the back of the sofa and just stared at the young man who was sitting in front of her. They probably didn't talk as much as they did today during their time together on the Voltron team. Pidge’s chest felt warm. Whether it was the wine that spoke in Katie, or whether it was the companionship that banished loneliness, she wanted this moment to last forever. It seemed to her that she could sit across from Keith and stare at his scar, his thick black hair, and his purple-tinted eyes for an eternity. Silence enveloped her.

Suddenly Pidge felt a light touch on her right cheek, and she shivered a little, and then looked at Keith. Carefully, with the fingertips of his left hand, he brushed away the short red strands that had escaped from under the kerchief. Katie remembered the kiss at Shiro's wedding, and her throat went dry, and she licked her lips involuntarily. Keith took his hand away, still staring at Pidge. She had the odd feeling that they were both thinking the same thing, but they were both afraid to take the next step.

To get out of the long silence, Pidge asked how Krolia was doing, and the conversation slowly began again, leaving the intimate moment behind, but keeping the question in Katie's mind: "What would happen if...?"

They stayed up late into the night. Katie didn't remember falling asleep, but she woke up on the bed, covered with a blanket, in the next room. She sat up, rubbing her eyes, realizing too late that her mascara must be all smudged. A dim light shone through the window. Pidge looked around, didn't find Keith, got up, smoothed out her shirt, and crept out of the room.

Kogane was sleeping on the sofa, one leg bent at the knee and his face hidden in the crook of his elbow. Like her, he was wearing yesterday's clothes: black jeans and a t-shirt, and his jacket was hanging on a hook at the entrance. Pidge stood over him for a couple of minutes, thinking about the twists of life and how she never would have thought that she would spend nights full of intimate conversations with this grumpy, silent man. Then Katie went to the bathroom to clean herself up, and went to the kitchen to make coffee.

"Cuban, who would have thought it," she chuckled, sticking her nose deep into the package and inhaling the aroma of coffee beans.

"Good morning," said a voice behind her, and Pidge almost spilled coffee, jumping up in surprise.

"Don't sneak up on me like that again!" she muttered.

"I didn't mean to frighten you. Sorry. Let me?” Keith took the package from her hand, touching her skin lightly with his fingers, and took the coffee grinder and turka out of the cabinet.

You can make coffee?" Katie asked, leaning on the counter next to Keith.

"Oh, nothing complicated, Lance showed me.”

“Lance? Showed you?” Pidge couldn't hide her surprise: when had Keith ever taken advice from Lance?

"Try not to express your feelings so clearly, sometimes it hurts," Keith said with a mock frown as he put the turka on the fire.

"Sorry," she said, and he smiled back.

In addition to his perfect swordsmanship, Keith had mastered the art of making coffee, which was so wonderful that Katie blinked with pleasure as she sipped it.

“Pidge?” Keith called softly.

"What?" she looked up at him.

“Have you ever thought about dating someone?"

The unexpected question definitely caught her off guard. She stared at the former commander, not quite sure what he was getting at.

"I thought it works another way," Pidge finally managed to say, unable to contain a grin. “You meet someone, you get to know them, you realize that you have something in common, you go on dates... well, something like that.”

“And if you already know someone and you can skip the first three steps and go straight to dating?” he was looking directly at her, and Pidge knew perfectly well, or thought she knew, that he was talking about them, but she wanted more certainty.

“Are you talking about someone in particular?" she asked softly, taking another sip and not taking her eyes off Keith. She could feel the color rising in her cheeks at the ambiguous topic of conversation.

"I think you know who I mean," Keith said.

Suddenly Katie was angry. Not to say that she was a fan of excessive sighs and romance. But Keith sounded like he was offering her a deal. Even if he liked her, he showed it in a strange way, which did not fit with Pidge's concept of falling in love and starting a relationship. She set the cup down on the table.

“I think I'll go," she said firmly and stood up.

“I’ll ride you,” he said looking up at her, visibly surprised by her reaction.

“Don’t. See you later, Keith," and she headed to the door, angry with herself for being deceived. She'd thought he really liked her. Otherwise, why were all these looks and these touches? Why did he even invite her?

Right at the door, Keith caught her wrist and spun her around.

“Katie…” it was the first time in a long time that Pidge had seen him not knowing what to do. And for the first time in a long time he called her by the first name. "I- I'm lonely."

"Ah, and you thought I would brighten up this loneliness out of old friendship?" she said sarcastically and indignantly. She tried unsuccessfully to pull her hand away.

"No, that's not it… After that kiss at the wedding, I couldn't stop thinking about you.”

"It was a drunken kiss at a drunken wedding," Pidge said. Yes, she couldn't forget that kiss either, though she tried. But it was easier for her to assume that it didn't mean anything. “I don't remember half of that night. And we decided it was a coincidence!”

"And if it was not?" What if it was a sign and not a coincidence?” his eyes searched her face as if searching for answers. “Why did you invite me?"

"I invited you?" Katie exclaimed. “I thought it's you…”

"Pidge," Keith said softly. He suddenly closed the distance between them and kissed her, fast and hot. She blinked, lost in the sensation. Before she knew what was happening, he was already pulling away, looking her in the eye. She started to say something, but as soon as she took a breath, he covered her mouth with his again. This time, he was more insistent and demanding, and his pressure brought down the walls that Pidge had been building since Shiro's wedding. Keith released her hand, and she moved it from his hip up his body, across his chest, up until her fingers were finally entwined in the hair at his neck. Short fingernails scraped the skin, ripping the half-moan from his lips. Keith squeezed Pidge in his arms.

"Feel it?" he asked hoarsely, breaking away from her for a moment. “It wasn't a coincidence.”

Katie couldn’t think straight, new sensations were overwhelming her. Yes, even if it were a coincidence, what difference does it make when it's so good now? He was alone, she was alone. He's her friend, she's his friend. What's wrong with trying something new? Obviously, they are attracted to each other. Probably this might not have happened if they hadn't been alone. But all life is a chain of accidents that make up a whole pattern. And Pidge wanted to see what it would be like.

"Wait -" she broke away from Keith's lips and looked into his eyes. “What if nothing…?"

She didn't finish, because he interrupted her with another kiss, muttering:

"Don't think about it…”

"But -" Pidge tried again.

"Stop thinking…" he breathed into her mouth, drawing her into a passionate kiss.

And suddenly, as if waiting for this permission, Pidge's head really stopped thinking. Katie didn't care what happened or didn't happen next. What point to worry if everything changes anyway? Passion rolled in her. So does it make sense to resist? No. Pidge pressed her body against Keith, feeling his warmth as she tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled him closer. She was breathing heavily and hard, but Keith seemed to like it — every second he was getting more daring in his caresses, and she was melting under his touch. He pulled her back into the room, and she didn't try to resist.

He literally threw her on the sofa, which creaked indignantly under the weight of two bodies. Katie found the edge of Keith's t-shirt and pulled it up impatiently. It was his turn to ask her if she was sure of what she was doing, and she heard her own voice, strangely unfamiliar, muffled and hoarse, through the pounding of their hearts.

"Stop thinking. Please…”

_ Two days later _

Pidge sat on a traditional Monday briefing. She was nodding from time to time at the words of the head of the project and was absently drawing squiggles in the notepad. Her phone vibrated in the pocket of her lab coat, and she opened the message.

"Hi, Holt. Lunch together? I'm in the Garrison. I decided to accept Iverson's offer. I want to be closer to my girlfriend."

Katie bit her lip, hiding a smile, and quickly wrote back: “Of course. And since I'm your girlfriend now, why don't you stop calling me by my last name?”

She put the phone away and propped her cheek on her hand, completely losing the thread of the meeting. She and Keith, who would have thought! Definitely not her.

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, I'm open to any comments, suggestions or opinion.  
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
